Histories and Herstories

I was particularly nervous about writing my history piece; mostly because I had no idea where to begin the story. My first drafts were about my family, and while they serve their purposes in regards to my history, they weren’t the ones living it, and so I had to rewrite the entire piece to be about myself. This is where the hard thinking came in. How do I write about my past, when I can’t remember some of it, or it wasn’t that significant to perform, and how, then, do I incorporate elements of gender and sexuality? The answer came to me as I was walking through CVS. In thinking about how I have varied my views on gender and sexuality, I remembered our class talking about stereotypes, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Softball has to be the most sexually-stereotyped sport for females, followed only by basketball. I’ve played both, often during the same year but in each other’s off season, and I am quite familiar with the stereotypes associated with each. Softball seemed to hold more weight for me, though.

So I began thinking during our presentations what it must have been like for each of us to define our own sexuality and gender. Watching Alex give his presentation was interesting, as he had to come up with his own view without any assistance growing up. It struck a chord with me. I was fortunate enough to grow up with a mom and a sister telling me how to act like a lady, but I also had a dad to teach me how to be different with it; how to be a different kind of woman. Nichole’s slide show had a different tune to it, though. When she began with the slides of pinup women in “womanly” professions, I was a little put-off, thinking that it really used to be like this. Women really did have to submit to being either a teacher, a housewife, or a secretary and be at the whim of the man in control. I think that the choice to “teach” us that her own theatre teacher was different was a good segue. I don’t remember having many male teachers growing up, and that influenced me a little into thinking that teaching was, in fact, a woman’s profession. How, then, was it to change, and who was to do so? Nichole’s teacher obviously proved to her that teachers come of any gender, and that we, ourselves can be teachers, even without a classroom.

Returning to theatre, though, makes me think of Rebecca’s reading of her diary to us. Frankly, keeping a diary has always been a personal interest of mine, and listening to Rebecca read aloud from hers was a delight. I particularly enjoyed watching her tell her story of how theatre got her through one of the worst times in her life, and to have that written down is even more extraordinary. What stands out to me, though, is the fact that she played Lady Macbeth, a notoriously bitchy role, and it was fun to think of her playing that character. I wonder what that meant to her and her own definition of gender. Did playing “Lady Macbitch” aide her in re-defining her concept of the powerful woman and how that woman can get through her own particular tragedy? And then there’s Rosa; Rosa with her wooden statues marking her progression through her dance years. At first, I was a little scared by the statues. Listening to her defense of them however, made more sense than them just being creepy wooden dolls. She became the woman that she is through her dance training, and that, to me is significant. She played the dancing girl role well, and I was the ball player, which brought me to the conclusion that we are all products of our environment, as we are all rather aware, and it is that which shapes us into the people we are today.

Cheers,
Patsy