How does the media displace our attention in identifying who qualifies as “gay” or “lesbian?” My answer to this question lies in television shows like “Will & Grace” and “The Ellen DeGeneres Show.” We’ve all fallen victim, myself included, to the wonderfully crafted idea that characters like Will and Jack and people such as Ellen are the common, everyday gay man or lesbian, when we actually know that this is false. Thanks to sitcoms like “Will & Grace,” our common idea of what it means to be gay is presented by the two extremes of Will and Jack. Will, being the rather subdued extreme, almost conservative in his actions, and Jack holds the title of “flaming queen.” Here is the arc, gay men of the world; now conform to one of the two. I feel that this is what sitcom creators are trying to say to us that watch the show, and, frankly, it’s a little uncomfortable to watch these stereotypes played out on cable television. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the Jack’s jazz hands and Will’s perfect ironic timing as much as the next girl, but I also know for a fact that Jack and Will can’t possibly represent the be all and end all image of gay men in the world.
Now I’d like to move on to my favorite talk show host, Ellen DeGeneres. I love her. I love what she does and represents, I think that all of her philanthropic causes are just, and I even think that she’s better than Oprah in terms of her mass appeal. With Ellen, though, I find there to be some confusion about her presentation to the public. Let’s take a step back and compare her to another lesbian talk show host, Rosie O’Donnell. If Rosie were to represent a certain type of lesbian image, I’d say that she was more on the “butch” side. Ellen, in comparison, seems to be taking the same route in her personal imagery, mostly by the way she dresses. What I find confusing here, is that I don’t know exactly what Ellen is representing. Is she attempting to appeal to lesbians of the world by being the “everylesbian?” If this is, in fact, her ultimate goal, then all confusion, for me, has just been cleared. If, however, Ellen is going for a different kind of appeal, then I’m going to have to do some more watching (as if I don’t watch it enough-almost religiously) and figure her out more.
My point here is that those of us who identify as “straight” unfortunately have a lot of our ideas about gay men and lesbians shaped by the media; specifically, by television. I have fallen victim to this ploy of TV writers and have gone on the hunt for my “Will” or my “Ellen,” and have found that the gays and lesbians that I meet, love, and adore, fall nowhere under the umbrella that has been cast by ABC, NBC, or CBS. In fact, the “Wills” and “Ellens” in my life have turned out to be equal parts “Will” and Jack” or “Rosie” and “Ellen” (I understand that happy mediums can sometimes be detrimental, but my life is full of such happy mediums). Here is what I propose should be done to fix this situation: challenge what is and has always been done! It has occurred to me that TV writers are sticking to this molded idea of what qualifies as TV-appropriate gay men and lesbians, and thus the rest of us are shielded once more from what exists outside the world of the studio audience, unless we attempt to find our own version of what’s on TV, and find that there is more to know and love.
Cheers,
Patsy
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